DBSA Chapter Leadership Online Learning 

Facilitator Orientation Series 2, Session 1

Facilitation Basics
April 20^th, 2005 7:00 p.m. Central Time

Facilitated by Matt Mattson, Chapter Relations Manger – DBSA

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 7:49:04 PM)
Welcome everyone! I’m Matt Mattson, Chapter Relations Manager for DBSA, and I’ll be facilitating this first session of the Online Facilitator Orientation Series! We'll start a few minutes after 7 p.m. CT. Feel free to chat in the meantime!

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:02:45 PM)
Welcome everyone! I’m Matt Mattson, Chapter Relations Manager for DBSA, and I’ll be facilitating this first session of the Online Facilitator Orientation Series!

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:04:29 PM)
We’ve got about 16 people registered for tonight, but we never know how many will show.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:04:37 PM)
Everyone ready to get started?

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:04:40 PM)
I have to say I have been observing the facilitators for some months now in anticipation of becoming one myself at some time. I think I have a pretty good handle on how to conduct things.

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:04:41 PM)
Welcome Matt. i am glad you are with us.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:04:45 PM)
yes

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:04:57 PM)
And I'm glad you are with us!

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:05:15 PM)
Yes.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:05:18 PM)
Let's get started then...

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:05:19 PM)
Hey Zen give it a try u never know

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:05:23 PM)
Yes... I am ready. I actually bought a new computer that is much faster than my old one. So I am getting these messages very quickly.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:05:32 PM)
We’ll stop the FORMAL discussion at 8:00 p.m. CT, but informal discussion can continue after that… We won’t be able to discuss EVERYTHING about facilitation, for sure, but we can get a start… Also, there are two more facilitator orientation chat sessions planned: May 18th – Managing Facilitation Challenges June 15th – Case Study Discussions

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:05:52 PM)
I’ll try to make sure we stay on topic, so please be understanding if I try to redirect our conversation at any point…

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:06:02 PM)
Got that on my paper Matt.............np

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:06:09 PM)
Tonight we’ll be discussing “the basics” of facilitation – whatever that means to you! I’ll pose some questions and discussion points, and you can chime in as often as you like.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:06:28 PM)
Please just keep participating, and I’ll try to send each of you a transcript of tonight’s discussion (barring any technical glitches).

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:06:41 PM)
I want to remind everyone that this is a session meant for SHARING best practices among chapter leaders – don’t expect too many specific instructions from me during the discussion. You all have the answers, I’m just guiding the discussion.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:06:44 PM)
thank you

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:06:47 PM)
Sounds good.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:06:54 PM)
Ty Matt

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:03 PM)
Where’s everyone typing from?

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:13 PM)
Montclair New Jersey

Les & Sandi (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:19 PM)
St. Petersburg FL

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:25 PM)
Union City California

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:26 PM)
I'm at home in my living room.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:27 PM)
I am in eastern ,Kentucky

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:29 PM)
u see mine......Lawrenceville GA

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:37 PM)
I'm in Chicago (if you hadn't guessed that)...

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:42 PM)
LOL MATT

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:43 PM)
near Pikeville

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:47 PM)
the windy city

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:49 PM)
I'm in Milwaukee, Wisconsin

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:07:54 PM)
DBSA Support Groups are: A gathering of peers who assist, encourage, and enable each other in helping themselves. Each one follows his/her own unique path to wellness and chooses to make that journey in the company of others headed in the same direction.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:08:01 PM)
was born in chi town

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:08:12 PM)
Ravenswood

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:08:29 PM)
Let’s continue with a review of the DBSA Support Group Guidelines… Would anyone like to share the guidelines they can remember off the top of their heads? Hint: “Share the Air” is one of them.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:08:52 PM)
Let’s continue with a review of the DBSA Support Group Guidelines… Would anyone like to share the guidelines they can remember off the top of their heads? Hint: “Share the Air” is one of them.

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:10 PM)
What's said here stays here.

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:18 PM)
Confidentiality is a very important guideline to be observed by all.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:19 PM)
I remember that confidentialitily is important

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:26 PM)
I see a lot of members who seem to have just plateau-ed out. There are there for a social encounter, have a lot of doubts about the possibility of wellness and can be resistant ("but..but...but...etc.") to getting "weller."

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:32 PM)
Don't let the discussion become a pity party

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:38 PM)
Great work all

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:45 PM)
good.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:47 PM)
not a 12 step program

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:50 PM)
keep em coming

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:56 PM)
cell phones off

Les & Sandi (Apr 20, 2005 8:09:57 PM)
A lot want to talk about how bad they have it

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:00 PM)
Good...

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:09 PM)
no cross talk. the person talking has the floor

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:13 PM)
Good.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:17 PM)
no cross talk.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:18 PM)
everyones a peer

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:26 PM)
No crosstalk and no judging of others.

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:32 PM)
no medical advice

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:40 PM)
as if dr.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:42 PM)
Very important, Ronnie... Can you expound that peer comment a little more?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:43 PM)
we r all mentally ill .......including group leader

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:47 PM)
good Elisabeth

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:54 PM)
I with les and sandy on a lot want to talk about how bad they have it. I'm sure I did a lot of that myself.

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:10:56 PM)
Support groups are not therapy groups.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:04 PM)
good stuff all.

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:07 PM)
crosstalk is hard to stop

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:08 PM)
not a repalcement for therepu

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:09 PM)
no belittling someone for their mental problems

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:13 PM)
DBSA Guidelines that every facilitator should begin EVERY Support Group meeting with: *Share the Air, *One person speaks at a time, *What is said here, stays here, *Differences of opinion are o.k., *We are all equal, *Use “I” language, *It’s o.k. not to share, *It’s everyone’s responsibility to make the support group a safe place to share.

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:18 PM)
we're not doctors, or pharmacist and there fore will not diagnose and direct

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:40 PM)
people do not have to share at all if they don't want to

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:47 PM)
everyone is a peer

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:50 PM)
Some groups have added other guidelines that are important to their group. But these are the national guidelines that we ask every group to share...

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:11:51 PM)
Lots of people want to share on what medication they are taking.

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:02 PM)
sometimes it's better to observe

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:07 PM)
How can facilitators USE these guidelines most effectively?

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:17 PM)
and we are there to support each other as peers

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:18 PM)
... with tact.

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:21 PM)
with compassion

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:28 PM)
by going over them

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:35 PM)
I usually have people raise their hand slightly if they have something to say

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:41 PM)
tact and compassion are important... tell me ways you apply them

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:44 PM)
I read mine or have a group member read them every meeting

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:50 PM)
good Connie.

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:57 PM)
remember, these are guidelines, not rules set in concrete

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:58 PM)
Ty Matt

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:12:59 PM)
When do you go over them Roxann

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:07 PM)
Good Bear... that's really important.

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:08 PM)
I sometimes like to pass the sheet around with the guidelines and have everyone take a turn to read aloud one of them. That makes the members more attentive and it is not just me speaking.

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:21 PM)
letting person know we have all been to that place, wherever it may be, at one point or another

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:21 PM)
before the support group

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:25 PM)
Great Lorry... Good idea. Any other ideas like that out there?

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:27 PM)
read them

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:30 PM)
That is a great idea, Lorry

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:38 PM)
Good...

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:44 PM)
I like the expression "we have all been to that place."

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:45 PM)
Talk to others, not at them

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:13:59 PM)
Print a copy and give to regular members???

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:03 PM)
Having them written in front of you when beginning meeting reminds you not to forget anything.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:04 PM)
My favorite is: *It’s everyone’s responsibility to make the support group a safe place to share.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:10 PM)
yes

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:11 PM)
Yeah... good idea connie.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:17 PM)
I had a poster on the wall with them printed

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:23 PM)
ty Matt

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:24 PM)
Do all of YOUR members (everyone) have a copy that they can read?

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:29 PM)
Good Middletown!

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:32 PM)
Yes

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:37 PM)
yes

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:43 PM)
In my group it is passed around at the beginning

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:46 PM)
good... good...

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:47 PM)
I also tell them not to say out loud in public, "hi, are u going to the support group"

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:14:49 PM)
that's good zen.

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:03 PM)
Sometimes I also ask the members to name the guidelines from heart rather than read from the sheet. It is interesting what people will remember from past meetings and also what they think is important. Then if they miss some important points,I add them.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:04 PM)
work with them not on them

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:09 PM)
How do the guidelines work FOR YOU?

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:18 PM)
they work well.

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:22 PM)
Using that identifier in public is a real no-no. It would bother me a lot.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:39 PM)
Good but here in the south 'bible belt' i cannot stop religion talk

Liz (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:39 PM)
(This user has entered Chapter Leader Online Learning) (IP = 69.245.1.155)

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:39 PM)
Very good Lorry. That is interesting to find out which ones people remember for themselves...

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:45 PM)
Confidentiality outside the group is very important for us.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:49 PM)
the guidelines work for me by setting the rules so everyone knows what to expect

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:51 PM)
we have two different groups - beginners and those who've "been around"

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:15:58 PM)
Religion is different for every group.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:01 PM)
what if you get someone who is ruid and is cursing

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:04 PM)
I would say "hi aren't you goign to the chat group" is a violation of confidentiality.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:18 PM)
agree stretch

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:19 PM)
yes Matt but it is not in the guidelines

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:29 PM)
There is no problem. Most are quite self understood. I stress the importance of confidentiaity and how easily that can be broken after the meeting.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:29 PM)
Good question Roxann... let's keep that one in mind for later... For now, how could the guidelines help?

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:31 PM)
rudeness and cursing is not allowed. perhaps good to state at beginning

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:37 PM)
privacey is a real issue. if you are in public with someone you DON'T want to know you are in the group, yelling to them that you know them from the group can be a problem

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:45 PM)
but religion is permitted as a testimony for what works for that person

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:47 PM)
We formerly had a member who talked far too long and talked down to other members.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:57 PM)
Some facilitators use them as a “SHIELD.” Basically, you can point to the guidelines when things get a little off-target in the meetings, and the guidelines can serve as the peace keeper… so YOU don’t have to.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:16:58 PM)
good

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:00 PM)
u can talee them out of the room and talk to them if they rude

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:02 PM)
Good point midtown.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:15 PM)
Good thank u Mat

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:18 PM)
What do you all think of that "Shield" idea?

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:21 PM)
so far everyone is nice and kind

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:28 PM)
How could you practically use that in your groups?

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:29 PM)
Shield is a great idea

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:30 PM)
agree Matt

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:35 PM)
I try to keep both religiion and AA, NA talk to a minimum

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:43 PM)
me to

kdcwsb (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:46 PM)
what is shield idea?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:17:55 PM)
read up kdc

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:01 PM)
Shield idea .... gently interject it.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:03 PM)
I like it matt

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:06 PM)
Some facilitators use them (guidelines) as a “SHIELD.” Basically, you can point to the guidelines when things get a little off-target in the meetings, and the guidelines can serve as the peace keeper… so YOU don’t have to.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:15 PM)
just repeatin'

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:23 PM)
Yes I keep repeatin them

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:32 PM)
Those guidelines can be the peacekeepers of the group...

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:36 PM)
Remember, DBSA is a self-help group. what helps us may not help others.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:40 PM)
For sure

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:45 PM)
I actually have never had to repeat the actual guidelines

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:45 PM)
yes bear agree

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:46 PM)
I suppose if a conflict amongst or within the group arises, the guidelines are in print and prove what we want to uphold.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:54 PM)
Does anyone think that one guideline is more important than any others?

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:18:58 PM)
Maybe say "...I'm sorry, but I have to repeat this rule."

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:16 PM)
Confidnetialitiy is very important to my memebers

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:17 PM)
Whe have to go back to the guidelines often. When people get off "track" and talk to much about things not related to the DBSA.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:18 PM)
no they are all equal

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:20 PM)
I think they are all important as a whole

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:30 PM)
They r all important thought

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:31 PM)
it is what is accepted in the support group

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:41 PM)
so it is very important

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:49 PM)
More important than reading the guidelines is that everyone AGREES TO THE GUIDELINES beforehand... then everyone is on the same page and can hold each other accountable to that agreement.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:19:58 PM)
yes

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:05 PM)
yes

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:07 PM)
No. guidelines are tools.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:08 PM)
Stretch... does that work for you?

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:08 PM)
That is true.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:19 PM)
but I don't refer to the guidelines,. I just say "OK, we are getting a little off track here, let's get back to topic" and that works great for me

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:27 PM)
it helps us guidlines

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:28 PM)
Last guideline: forgiving when we temporarily forget the guidelines is important too.

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:48 PM)
I like let's get back to the topic

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:55 PM)
I make sure everyone has a chance to talk

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:20:59 PM)
Good middletown... The trick is to be sure that it isn't YOUR rules the group is following but the GROUP's rules... hence the national guidelines. Good work though.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:13 PM)
and checkl in with all members on how they r and how they r doing

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:15 PM)
Let's change topics a little...What, do you think, are the most important characteristics of an effective facilitator?

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:20 PM)
I C your point, Matt

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:29 PM)
yes, same here connie

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:39 PM)
being a good listener

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:45 PM)
Yes, we have a couple of people, we have to talk to and go further in the meeting. Some people will just talk and talk. We have between 12-20 people usually, who should all get in a couple words each night.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:47 PM)
Keep the group moving........Check in on everyone as a group be empathitic

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:49 PM)
They have to care about the PEOPLE in the group

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:50 PM)
What, do you think, are the most important characteristics of an effective facilitator? good Ronnie!

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:51 PM)
what each person has to say is important to them.

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:56 PM)
sympathy...thorougness in making sure all have a chance to speak. a certain firmness in staying on topic.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:21:58 PM)
keep it on a roll

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:06 PM)
try to make it not boring

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:14 PM)
good middletown and roxann... zen and Bear... great!

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:24 PM)
and letting each person have a say

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:36 PM)
DBSA suggests that there are 5 ROLES of a DBSA Support Group Facilitator… I like to say, “FACILITATION IS SIMPLE, BUT IT’S NOT EASY!”: -Simply START the support group -Simply LISTEN actively -Simply maintain discussion FLOW -Simply RESPOND to challenges -Simply CLOSE the support group

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:41 PM)
let them speak there mind

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:42 PM)
keep it cheerful and flowing toward a nice level instead of depressing.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:53 PM)
do not judge

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:53 PM)
Someone who is a good listener and takes in all that each person has to say while they are talking. Sometimes a nod of the head is helpful or a "thank you, ..." after each person speaks such as at the check is good.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:56 PM)
What do you think of those 5 roles?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:22:59 PM)
Letting group memeber know that we have information availiable at al ltimes

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:23:09 PM)
Trying to gently seek an alternative to defeatist language?

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:23:13 PM)
GREAT, Matt

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:23:14 PM)
Good Lorry.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:23:28 PM)
I like those Matt

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:23:29 PM)
I agree with them.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:23:42 PM)
yes

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:23:44 PM)
agreee

JennieC (Apr 20, 2005 8:23:47 PM)
hi ronnie

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:05 PM)
Zen... I'm interested in your input on this... the alternatives to defeatist language is important.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:20 PM)
Here's a fun one...

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:25 PM)
What are some of the biggest dangers you could imagine facilitators experiencing?

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:27 PM)
We give leeway to a person in crisis. when that person needs a little more attention, we have someone take them aside for alittle one-on-one

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:36 PM)
Good Bear...

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:41 PM)
Suicidal threats

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:43 PM)
trying to dignoise

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:44 PM)
perhaps saying "Can anyone here say anything to [so and so] about this?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:51 PM)
I agree with Middletown

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:55 PM)
it happended to me

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:55 PM)
Violence and poor behaviour.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:24:55 PM)
a person comtemplating suicide

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:01 PM)
Yeah.. midtown. Suicidal threats are the most common challenge mentioned.

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:10 PM)
Or maybe, "Has anyone had any success with this issue."

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:13 PM)
what do we do as DBSA group leaders MATT>>>

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:14 PM)
violence is a real possibility

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:19 PM)
Thanksfully, I have yet to have to face that one

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:27 PM)
good zen... that's great stuff. great facilitation stuff.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:35 PM)
i have helped people from sueiside

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:42 PM)
yes I use that one, zen

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:49 PM)
talked to them and asked them to cal l911

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:50 PM)
My facilitator always says, " If you are suicidal, make sure you call a hospital. Should we share a hospital hot line?

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:51 PM)
or dr

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:56 PM)
that is wonderful, Roxann

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:57 PM)
Have any of you faced the suicidal participant challenge or other major challenges?

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:25:58 PM)
We did. It took alittle talking to calm that person down. she finally left

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:26:00 PM)
I have had someone talk about suicide.........what is our resposnibilitu Matt

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:26:09 PM)
hospital hotline = good idea

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:26:14 PM)
yes

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:26:27 PM)
What do you think your responsibility is, Connie?

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:26:36 PM)
Good Bear...

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:27:10 PM)
Why do you want to be a support group facilitator? What do you get out of it?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:27:15 PM)
to make sure that person is safe but do we call their home?? We do not know of theri persona situation Matt

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:27:25 PM)
We have never faced violence. I might remind violent one that violence is against larger law and remind them that violence could lead to a 911 call-what do you think, is this too harsh?

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:27:31 PM)
I think we should advise them to contact their doctor or hospital, and if they get really bad to call 911

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:27:33 PM)
You're right... it's a tough question.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:27:45 PM)
I wish to help others that have suicidal Idealations

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:27:46 PM)
MAtt was that for me?

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:00 PM)
when we have had people who talk of suicide, we make a verbal agreement with them "not to do anything until next week". It works so far

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:08 PM)
911 is your friend. Don't hesitate if anyone is in danger... suicide, violence, serious health issue.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:29 PM)
i have talked it out with friends when they are on the verge

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:31 PM)
Yeah, Conniee... tough question was for you... I'm not sure the answer, other than to err on the side of caution.

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:38 PM)
Explain to the suicidal one that many of us have experienced suicidal ideations and that the proper response is to call your hospital immediately or call doctor.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:38 PM)
ok that is all our responsibility is Matt ????????

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:44 PM)
and make sure they get proper care right away

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:55 PM)
exactly, zen

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:28:57 PM)
Remember, you're a PEER and a a support group facilitator, not a trained EMT or a trained crisis intervener.

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:14 PM)
when someone talks suicidal in my group, I remind them that we all have felt that way and that it is a choice. If they really WANTED to do it, they would not be at group

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:18 PM)
I don't neccesarily think its our responsibility as a supervisor but our respsibility as a caring person.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:23 PM)
Thank you for saying that MATT-big relief

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:30 PM)
yes

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:30 PM)
and remind them that the feelings they're going throuh is chemical and not their real feelings

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:31 PM)
The violent day, although mostly verbal, shunned a lot of people away from the group. People got scared.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:32 PM)
Why do you want to be a support group facilitator? What do you get out of it?

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:38 PM)
good answer zen

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:47 PM)
yes bear

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:49 PM)
Good thought Zen.

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:59 PM)
If I can save one person from going through the hell I went through Matt, then it's all worth it

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:29:59 PM)
Why do you want to be a support group facilitator? What do you get out of it?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:00 PM)
I like to give back to what so many have given me in the past as in mental health aides in hospital

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:12 PM)
it's a cry for help...they do want to live...they have to pay attention to that part of themselves...does that sound too much like trying to be a shrink?

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:15 PM)
Good Elisabeth... That is a powerful reason.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:27 PM)
I feel good when someone says thank you connie for your help

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:30 PM)
I feel great knowing I am supplying people with tools to help them through their battle with their illness

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:31 PM)
i want to help people as much as i can

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:40 PM)
Good mid town.

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:42 PM)
I have known facilitators to drive a group member who is suicidal to the hospital. I heard once that that is not a good idea. We are not trained to deal with some one in that type of crisis. Anything can happen while we are driving the individual--attack you, open car door and fall out, etc. What do you think?

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:42 PM)
I had suicidal thoughts in the past and I wish to help others stay away from that road

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:43 PM)
Sometimes when someone is very depressed we arrange for one on one discussion instead of remaining in the group

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:46 PM)
knowing i can save a life is the greatest gift to human beings

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:47 PM)
"the hell I went through...yes"

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:30:56 PM)
I've been there on both sides of the issue. I feel that I can help in ways that others can't

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:31:05 PM)
i have been there

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:31:08 PM)
I agree Lorry, not a good idea

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:31:23 PM)
What are some ways that facilitators can maintain a healthy “flow” to their meetings? What does that look like?

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:31:41 PM)
I ask people what they used to do... what they used to enjoy

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:31:51 PM)
then try to bring them back to that place.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:31:53 PM)
by being friendly and by asking how everyone is and feels

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:11 PM)
Remind them that they can get better..........enjoy things again

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:12 PM)
saying, we haven't heard from so and so. What's on your mind tonight, so and so?

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:12 PM)
Limit initial speach. Go back to new one's and people with specific issues.

Roxann (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:14 PM)
and being there for all

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:15 PM)
first, the facilitator has to be healthy, then the rest of the group will have a solid meeting

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:16 PM)
I direct the questions to different people during the conversation, "How does that work for you, so-in-sO?"

kdcwsb (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:21 PM)
bouncing off my own experiences as they relate to what someone has just said

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:24 PM)
Everything takes TIME

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:31 PM)
Bear... great point!

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:34 PM)
yes and give meds a chance

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:37 PM)
Good midtown!

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:44 PM)
At the start of the Share/Care meetings, the facilitator may ask "What do you hope to get out of this evening's meeting"

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:51 PM)
O.K. KDCWSB... that's good.

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:32:58 PM)
A good thing to say

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:33:01 PM)
I also pass out papers in the beginning that say "What would YOU like to talk about tonight?" and have them pass them up to me after intros

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:33:07 PM)
all of us have tried many differant meds.............it may take years to find the right way

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:33:08 PM)
GREAT JUDY... ABSOLUTELY GREAT!!!!!!!!

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:33:15 PM)
I rely on other members who I know have gotten through situations and ask them to address the person with the problem

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:33:15 PM)
god idea middletown

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:33:23 PM)
That's good too midtown.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:33:23 PM)
good

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:33:56 PM)
yes, that gives ME topic ideas, and the meeting basically runs itself

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:34:03 PM)
How do most of you discuss meds

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:34:23 PM)
Good Elisabeth... How do most of you discuss meds?

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:34:31 PM)
How do you manage those med discussions?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:34:33 PM)
That what works for one does not always work for anothe

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:34:40 PM)
I always give a CAVEAT...this has worked for me, but it might not work for all.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:34:41 PM)
our group discusses them often (meds) we just tell what we know and how they worked for us, if we have had them

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:34:41 PM)
I usually talk about everyone being different. Like some people can take Aleve and others can take aspirin

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:06 PM)
We're lucky. we have people that are great with different situations and call on them when needed

kd (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:06 PM)
we usually ask how certain meds have affected other people, but in no way are medical diagnoses

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:06 PM)
We always have a "million" questions about meds

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:08 PM)
Everyone is diferant biologically

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:26 PM)
Remember "I" language...

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:32 PM)
Yeah. what works for us may not work for others

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:37 PM)
Good connie

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:40 PM)
exactly bear

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:47 PM)
ty Matt

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:35:52 PM)
remind everyone that sometimes a doctor will have to try you on a few meds until you find the right one.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:03 PM)
GREAT one zen

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:14 PM)
especially those who are newly dx

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:16 PM)
That the right mix comes eventually.........to hang in there

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:16 PM)
Do not give up...there are hundreds of meds out there.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:24 PM)
good point zen. People always get frustrated so fast... unfortunately doctors have to try lots of different meds.

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:34 PM)
but you have to be honest with your med doc so he can prescribe the right one

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:50 PM)
I have found that sometimes the check in can be a bit difficult to manage: there are some who go on and on rather than say a brief sentence or two and then others don't know what to say to get started. So I came across a sheet of paper with many faces each describing a feeling. I give each attendee a sheet and ask them to identify how they are feeling tonight (right now). Then I go around and have check in. The advantage of this is that everyone gets a general idea of where everyone is at.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:51 PM)
sometimes it takes many meds for many ppl

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:36:59 PM)
and they get frustrated

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:37:00 PM)
A question came up at a board meeting-what if a meeting attendee shared that he has been violet towards his children or spouse-what could/should be our course of action?

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:37:14 PM)
Lorry... good point about the check in.

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:37:34 PM)
We talk some about Dr's. and different therapists, what works and what does'nt, for one. Some people have switched after these discussions and are with better proffesionals.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:37:43 PM)
Where did you find that Lorry??

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:37:49 PM)
Judy... good question.. what do you think? others?

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:37:59 PM)
violence toward children? Say very firmly that he must discuss this with a trained professional...we are supportive, but cannot be toward that.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:38:08 PM)
good zen.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:38:26 PM)
Mat ti did not think that was out responsibility

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:09 PM)
What do you believe the ideal size for a support group to be?

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:12 PM)
Using my sheet with faces then helps when each person has his/her own time to speak about his/her own issue. It is often the case that as one person begins to speak he identifies himself with others in the group feeling the same way. before you know it, there is much sharing and everyone gets involved without much coaxing.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:16 PM)
15

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:22 PM)
6

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:37 PM)
if we get more than 10 people, we split the group up

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:37 PM)
i have 6 now

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:43 PM)
good midtown...

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:47 PM)
10

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:39:54 PM)
About six...when it gets into double figures, we try to break into two groups if another facilitator is in attendence.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:02 PM)
DBSA suggests that support groups should not be larger than 12 people.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:05 PM)
which we ALWAYS have MORE than 10

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:05 PM)
we had 28 2 weeks ago!!

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:05 PM)
i have 6 now

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:08 PM)
We make sure people are with good proffesionals. We do not like GMC's to prescrib pshych meds.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:12 PM)
too many and not everyone gets to talk

kd (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:32 PM)
how long should groups run?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:35 PM)
I make sure everyone gets to talk by addressing each individual

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:36 PM)
I did the math the other day, and if it is a 90 min. meeting with 12 people, and you figure in some intro time with announcements and everything... that gives everyone exactly 5 minutes to talk.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:37 PM)
not much.

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:39 PM)
I find with younger people (20's) to let them know if they go on SSDI, it's just a "band-aid" fix..... they can go on to live normal, productive lives

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:39 PM)
if you have a very large group. remind everyone to be aware of this and give others a chance to talk.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:52 PM)
that is not enough time, Matt

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:54 PM)
good zen.

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:56 PM)
we also work with priorties. that way people with needs get heard.

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:40:59 PM)
What type of facilitator training does your group provide for new facilitators.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:41:00 PM)
true MAtt.......

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:41:01 PM)
no, midtown, it isn't

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:41:19 PM)
Remind everyone that we all can learn a lot by listening

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:41:30 PM)
that is why we have no more than 6-8

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:41:37 PM)
Does your chapter (all) share the facilitation duties, and are there others that can step in? Are there specific requirements to become a facilitator?

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:41:40 PM)
We usually run overtime but i got group to stop in time last time.........and left in time

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:41:50 PM)
We have to go through training

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:41:58 PM)
people participate by comfort level. we let people know thats alright

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:42:06 PM)
Whose training, Elisabeth?

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:42:08 PM)
I have people who are "Facilitators", and I give them a brief training

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:42:26 PM)
When I was ill with an episode I had a girl volunteer to do my group and now she has her own group :)

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:42:30 PM)
Our Chapter leader, Marion Becker

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:42:38 PM)
Midtown... I like to put "" around "facilitator" too, because we're all just peers... right?

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:42:44 PM)
Our problem is finding facilitators... BIG problem

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:42:52 PM)
What does “PEER-LED, SELF-HELP” mean to you?

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:42:52 PM)
exactly

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:43:08 PM)
We are all equal

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:43:15 PM)
people who have been there and done that

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:43:17 PM)
all learning

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:43:19 PM)
"We've been there, we can help"...........think that sums it up ;)

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:43:19 PM)
We are all sharing the job of helping each other toward mental health

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:43:37 PM)
agree with all previous comments

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:43:51 PM)
It sounds like you all know this stuff already... but here's our statement: DBSA Support Group Facilitators are PEERS! Not therapists, not counselors, not doctors or psychiatrists… Facilitators do NOT need to be certified. Facilitators are simply patients or supporters that help lead the group

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:44:06 PM)
actually, the group is all about helping ourselves. it's sharing our experiences that helps others

Les & Sandi (Apr 20, 2005 8:44:13 PM)
That is a big boost, when someone is ready, to ask them if they would be the facilitator with your help. Great for their self esteem.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:44:21 PM)
Yes that i know Matt

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:44:28 PM)
Led and guidance by peers. Giving you the opportunity to get new "tools" for your own treatment. We are all responsible for ourselves.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:44:29 PM)
helping ourselves... that's exactly what helps others. facilitators need to help themselves too!

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:44:41 PM)
WE are all equal but it is the facilitators responsibility to make sure that everyone gets a chance to talk if they wish and noone monopolizes the conversation even if we have to break in mid sentence. People in the manic mood, as we know, can be very talkative.

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:44:49 PM)
Over the years of my experience six seems to be a good number. Most people get a bit nervous if there are too many people in one group because they realize their time to speak is limited. If I am quite familiar with most in the group - I kind of know where they are at. depending on that, I might keep the group as one up to about 9, but prefer to split into 2 groups. Of course, one has to have another facilitator to do it; not everyone can facilitate without a bit of experience in a group setting, etc.

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:44:58 PM)
Being a facilitator means helping to keep order to things

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:45:00 PM)
all I do in "training" is let them know what DBSA expects out of us as a "leader" and go oever what "I" expect out of our meetings

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:45:06 PM)
yes and don't put YOUR mental health on the back burner or u will no help group

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:45:07 PM)
perhaps make sure that you check in yourself so that everyone is aware that you have issues too

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:45:08 PM)
Actually... *It is everyone's responsibility to make the support groups a safe place to share.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:45:15 PM)
yes

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:45:21 PM)
And we come full circle to the GUIDELINES...

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:45:33 PM)
there was a lady who came to the group so she could support a parent and learned that she was depressed. and she turned out to be a great leader

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:45:54 PM)
Good story Bear... a good reason not to limit our membership in any way.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:46:15 PM)
If you all had one piece of advice to give to other new facilitators, what would that be?

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:46:26 PM)
compassion

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:46:30 PM)
Be patient firm but gentle

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:46:46 PM)
and remember Matt it is important for us to keep our owm mental health good

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:46:55 PM)
GREAT POINT, Connie.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:46:58 PM)
listen instead of talking all the time, you learn more that way

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:47:01 PM)
treat others as you would have them treat you

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:47:15 PM)
let them know we are there to support them.... too many people do not have anyone else

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:47:22 PM)
We have facilitator training after our board meetings and I suggest that everyone sit in on the training even if they do not plan on officially being a Facilitator because, like you said Matt, it is everyone's responsibility to have a safe environment.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:47:26 PM)
Remeber to check in with EVERYONE and give them a chace to talk

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:47:35 PM)
I want to give time for you all to pose questions to the group for a few minutes... it is in your hands.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:47:38 PM)
That's great, Judy!

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:47:49 PM)
k Matt thank you

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:47:53 PM)
anyone have any tips on recruiting facilitators..... we are really having trouble!

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:03 PM)
Do you all have your members sit in a circle? Or at a circular table? Long tables are not a good idea. I actually had some people not return after their first meeting because of this and I was simply trying to ease my way in to making this group a DBSA group.

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:07 PM)
remind the newcomer that we are on the same wavelength as they are

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:14 PM)
Circle

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:16 PM)
Hello Ellen

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:22 PM)
Ask in group Elisabeth if anyone is interested

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:27 PM)
circle

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:33 PM)
RECRUITING FACILITATORS: Make it simple. Try "Co-Facilitators." Ask a person to help you for a while, and start slow...

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:36 PM)
Circle. everyone included

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:45 PM)
I can tell you what worked for me: When I realized how much good the mettings did for me, where I am now, and I was at a point when I could give something back.

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:47 PM)
I am in process of recruiting more facilitators b/c our group is getting so large

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:48:52 PM)
I recommend, Elisabeth, asking individuals... and not just in the large group.

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:49:24 PM)
Oh yeah...what about if somone volunteers to you to become a facilitator but you feel that they are not ready?

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:49:32 PM)
We've tried the co-facilitators. .... now we're down to so few and have so many people coming to us, we find ourselves getting "burnt" out

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:49:46 PM)
Zen tell them to try a few more meetings

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:50:05 PM)
Zen... try co-facilitating first, and then ask them if it would be alright to give feedback afterward...

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:50:18 PM)
can u split the group in 2 elisabeth

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:50:20 PM)
tryingzen has a good point. ... we have people who come week after week but are just not cut out for it

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:50:29 PM)
we already do split into two

kd (Apr 20, 2005 8:50:31 PM)
apologies if this has already been answered, but where can i find a copy of the support group guidelines?

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:50:49 PM)
We have people who naturally have entered the role from leadership experience in the work sector.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:50:50 PM)
in the big book KD

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:50:57 PM)
Great question KD... BE SURE TO VISIT DBSA’s Chapter Management Website: www.DBSAlliance.org/ChapMgtEntrance.html

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:51:02 PM)
Most of my group is on SSDi

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:51:03 PM)
The DBSA book

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:51:09 PM)
we used to have two facilitators. one to lead, the other to watch to see body language and make sure that those who need to be involved get involved

kd (Apr 20, 2005 8:51:13 PM)
ha ha connie

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:51:20 PM)
We stress that if a person who normally facilitates has alot of issues they want to discuss that they should feel no pressure to have to facilitate. Of course to do this you need "extra" Facilitators willing to fill in.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:51:23 PM)
If you're an affilitated chapter, you should have the password for the Chapter Management Section.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:51:24 PM)
really do u have it KD?????

Lorry (Apr 20, 2005 8:51:25 PM)
Since my 2 groups are comaratively new, i am keeping my eye out for who I think might be good facilitators. I have already asked a few but they are still very hesitant to commit themselves. As soon as I find a few interested members, I plan to have a small facilitator training session so they feel more secure and are prepared tohandle some of the more difficult issues that may arise such as monop[olizing, cross talking, etc.

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:52:02 PM)
Lorry didn't Matt say there is no 'official training needed'

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:52:03 PM)
We've tried to get some people to come to a "facilitator" group just out of interest and they don't

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:52:03 PM)
?

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:52:15 PM)
this obviously is our biggest problem

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:52:40 PM)
yes, why ARE epople so hesiteant to get involved?? It is so frustrating!!

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:52:41 PM)
I think a facilitator orientation (even something simple like this chat) can be very helpful Lorry! Great.

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:05 PM)
Lorry, that is such a good idea because I am constantly on the look-out too for new Facilitators since there is such a variety of reasons people might drop out

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:11 PM)
facilitating is a personal issue, some people may not be ready to handle their own issues and the groups at the same time

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:12 PM)
I almost feel like hiring a recruiting firm ... LOL

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:23 PM)
Well...............thank u so much Matt for letting me attend this meeting

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:25 PM)
yes an orientation gives them for confidence and knowledge about the group

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:28 PM)
It's scary to get involved... They need to know they won't be overwhelmed. They also don't think you're talking to them when you say "Anyone want to help?" Specifically ask individuals.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:38 PM)
thank you matt

tryingzen (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:41 PM)
You hafta be your own recruiting firm...

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:45 PM)
Nice to meet u all .........I need to let daughter have compute

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:48 PM)
On May 18th, we’ll be discussing “MANAGING FACILITATOR CHALLENGES,” so be sure to join us then for that discussion. That is one of the biggest concerns of many facilitators, I know!

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:50 PM)
LOL, good one elisabeth

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:53:58 PM)
Thank u again Matt:)

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:04 PM)
Looking forward to chatting again on May 18th! Until then, I can be reached at MMattson@DBSAlliance.org or (800) 826-3632.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:14 PM)
BE SURE TO VISIT DBSA’s Chapter Management Website: www.DBSAlliance.org/ChapMgtEntrance.html You can find a Chapter Leader Discussion Board there to continue this conversation.

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:17 PM)
Take Care!

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:19 PM)
Thank you

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:19 PM)
Thanks Matt... check your email... I sent you one today

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:19 PM)
Thankyou Matt

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:24 PM)
byE Matt, thanks

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:27 PM)
Thanks again for participating – here ends the formal discussion for this evening, but you’re welcome to continue networking with other DBSA chapter leaders.

elisabeth (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:28 PM)
Thanks all. See you next time

Bear (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:29 PM)
Thankyou Connie

Stretch (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:33 PM)
Thank you Matt.

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:40 PM)
Thank you all...

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:40 PM)
Matt thank u

connie-GA-Facilitator (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:46 PM)
thank u beat

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:50 PM)
these chats are so helpful

DBSA_staff_MATT (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:53 PM)
Good night, and talk with you all soon... BE HEALTHY!

Judy (Apr 20, 2005 8:54:56 PM)
Matt, I appreciate your help

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:55:02 PM)
night Matt

DBSA Middletown (Apr 20, 2005 8:55:07 PM)
bye all

Ronnie (Apr 20, 2005 8:55:32 PM)
everyone take care