When my second son was born, I knew right away that something about him was different. I tried for two months to breastfeed him, unsuccessfully. I finally put him on a bottle so that we could both get some sleep. His screaming continued for years. I would try to tell the doctor what was going on, and I tried to talk with my father who is a physician. They both explained that I was tired and I needed to give him a break. When he was six, I took him to a therapist at my fathers suggestion. He was given the diagnosis of Oppositional Defiant Disorder. No medications were given to him, only therapy. This seemed to help for a little while.

We moved to a new town when my son was about nine, which was very difficult. My son was eventually hospitalized, when he was about 11, and put on antidepressants. He continued to get much worse. I would try to explain to people what was happening, and more often then not, I was told that I was too strict and needed to "lighten up". I was given many, many parenting books.

I had four children by this time and I knew the other three were not suffering as a result of my parenting skills. I am an at-home mother and I take my job very seriously. After several years of increasing antidepressant dosages and increasing rapid cycling, my son landed in the hospital again, this time with the diagnosis of bipolar disorder. I did not know what this was but it seemed to be a match to what I had been saying for many years.

This was not the end of the story. I then had to fight to find a doctor who could help him get on the right medication. I read (and still read) as much information as possible about this disorder.

The most important thing to remember is that none of us should treat this as a secret! This is just part of our lives and we all need to deal with it together. My son is so important to me. Nothing would stop me from getting help for him. We do not have a lot of money but I would live in a shack if I needed to, in order to get him what he needs. I am thankful to say that he is doing very well and is making great grades his Junior year of high school.