I have suffered with bipolar disorder all my life. Since I was a child, I have always experienced mood problems. Some days I would feel like the whole world was crashing down on me and then the next day or week I would feel like I could do anything.

I have always experienced the depression more than the mania – feeling like I am worthless and without purpose. I went through each day feeling as if I was wasting my life. When things got too hard I would move to a different city and feel happy for a while, but the cycle would continue.

I always felt alone and ashamed, and no one would understand me. I was finally correctly diagnosed at age 20 and began treatment with medication and intense therapy.

I have lost many people in my life. Only the family and friends that understand my disease have stood by me. Bipolar disorder is hard for people when they don’t know what’s going on or how to help. The more I was abandoned, the worse I felt. I tried to commit suicide because I couldn’t take my pain and confusion any more. I reached out so hard and yet I felt alone. I tried to cure myself, and keep my pride but all I was really doing was denying my condition.